Bob stepping down

At the young age of 83, it looks like Bob Barker is finally calling it quits. According to this story, there will be no more "come on downs" after June. For all of us who grew up watching Bob, it is indeed a sad day.

Bat Dog

Yep...I'm one of those sick people who dresses up his dog for Halloween.

A Beautiful Day

After yesterdays rather bah-humbug weather, today has turned into a picture postcard day. Low humidity, about 80 degrees and a nice gentle breeze blowing though the open windows of the Margarita Lounge. I just finished giving Lucy a bath in the back yard. For anyone that has tried to give a dog a bath (especially one who doesn't want one), you know the hell I just went through.

My parents came over last night for my birthday celebratrion/dinner and I had only a minor hangover this morning. A few glasses of Rioja will do that...you would have loved it Scottie....

As for today, I am guaranteeing that the Dolphins don't lose. It's kind of hard to lose when you have a bye week. I've decided to head to Casa de Hickman today to help him root on his Browns. Normally I wouldn't do this, but they are playing the Jets today and I hate the Jets. Rumors are that Pimpbling might make an appearance, so this might turn into a little party after all.

No more political ads!!

OK...I have reached by breaking point. No...I'm not going to run out and start shooting people. I have finally reached the point where I am sick of all political ads. Even the ones that are from "my side" make me want to vomit. You know that feeling you get when a really sleazy used-car salesman is trying to sell you a car? Yep...thats how I feel right now. The more I follow politics, the more I realize that any politician out there would sell his mother for more political power. Vote for whoever you want to because I am now categorized as "uninterested".

So, what else is happening? Yes...Cheryl is still pregnant and she is due the first week in February. Note that Cheryl is the only one pregnant..."we" are not pregnant. That whole "we" thing always bugged both of us as "we" do not both carry the kid. Yes, there are the occasional cravings for ice cream and chocolate, but in general she has been a trooper. Cheryl has been able to feel the little man moving around for about a month, but I have only been able to feel him for about two weeks. Talk about cool!

And my 33rd birthday is coming up next week. Being a Halloween baby is pretty cool growing up, but when you get to be an old bastard like me, it kind of loses its sparkle. Actually, every year it seems to show up quicker and you feel older and older...you are ready for bed at 10pm, even on the weekends...you start seeing wrinkles around your eyes...you start getting fat. Getting old blows.

It keeps getting worse

Just when you think the Dolphins can't get any worse, they do. Yes, today I again viewed the joke of a football team that Miami is now calling the Dolphins. Since Kris was out in Texas and couldn't make it, I took Cheryl's friend Jen with me. We did some tailgating with a bunch of cheeseheads...sweated out asses off in the 90 degree heat...hung out with Paco and Taco. And the result was the same...a big, ugly loss to a team that we should have beat. I have spent the rest of the afternoon vomiting.

What was I thinking?

Well, I was wrong. Not that being wrong is all that abnormal for me, but I really thought the Dolphins could pull one out this week. As usual they fumbled, dropped passes and threw interceptions. Maybe it was that huge glass of Chianti I drank last night after dinner that pushed me to make such a bold and utterly stupid prediction. At least I only lost $20 on the game (in addition to my pride). It looks like the Dolphins have entered the losers realm of the Chicago Cubs and the Detroit Lions....there's always next year, right?

Day of the Dog

What seemed like a rather boring day of football ended up being a big day for the underdogs. Indiana beats Iowa. Vandy beats Georgia. Auburn beats Florida. And the Detroit Tigers are going to the World Series. Must be something in the air this weekend.

With that said I am making a guarantee for tomorrow. I am going to guarantee a Dolphins victory over the Jets. I may be crazy and I will probably lose my $20 bet to Mr. Brill, but I have the feeling that a victory is in the cards. Go Fins!

The Office Slob strikes again

For everyone who works in an office, there is the office slob. This person is usually a man in his 40s or 50s who has essentially given up on life. He is the type of man who would wear sweatpants into the office if he was allowed. He is significantly overweight. He burps, eats loudly, steals other people's food out of the fridge, and never tucks in his shirt. He has the personality of a telephone book. We have one of these men in our office. He was hired about a year ago and he fits the bill perfectly. To protect the innocent we will call him Peter.

Now in addition to being a slob, Peter is also a dumbass. This is a VERY dangerous combination as you will now see. Today Peter decided to wash out a used gas can in the break room sink. Yes...I did type that correctly. He washed out a one-gallon GAS CAN next to the fridge in the middle of our KITCHEN at work. Do you have any idea how bad something like this stinks up an office? In addition to the smell, I can't imagine the local fire marshall would consider that a safe place to work.

I can understand occasional absent-mindedness....we all have these moments. Forgetting the dry cleaning...forgetting where you were going...typing sexual IMs to a 16 year-old Congressional page. But what type of a moron does something like this? I have been hard-pressed to think of anything quite this stupid.....

Cardinal Nation

I have always heard that St. Louis is a great baseball city. But after spending three days there during the NLDS, I found out that this is incorrect...the world "great" does not do justice to these crazy people. They are insane. Insane in a good way, but insane none the less. The highlight of our weekend had to be Paddy-Os on Sunday Night after the Cardinals clinched the series. After fighting upsteam against thousands of screaming fans to even get to the place, the atmosphere we found was much more a college football pre-game tailgate than a baseball game.

People screaming....dancing...chugging beers...you name it. We were lucky to have about 12 people in our group and everyone had a blast. The funny thing was that it was a Sunday Night. I can't even imagine how crazy it would have been on a Friday or Saturday Night.

Yeah, I went to a few of the sessions we had for our conference, but I spent a little too much time at a few of the other local watering holes. It was a long trip back yesterday but the memories were well worth a few hangovers. Maybe Pimpbling will even update his blog after what seems like forever. It's not like there is a lack of subjects from the weekend.

Head West Young Man

So, I'm heading to St. Louis for the weekend for our National sales conference. Normally these events are pretty boring, but this year should be an exception because:

1) There are some pretty good college football games on Saturday afternoon to watch.
2) The Cardinals have a home playoff game on Saturday and maybe another on Sunday. Since my hotel is directly across the street from the stadium, the city should be crazy.
3) The Dolphins play the Patriots on Sunday and there are plenty of sports bars in St. Louis.

What about this conference, you ask? You've got to have your priorities people....

Humiliation

Looks like the Dolphins are in lots of trouble. Losing to Pittsburgh was tough, but they did win the Super Bowl last year. Losing to Buffalo was harder to take. Losing to the Houston Texans is downright humiliating and embarassing. And now we have to play New England and the Jets on the road in back-to-back weeks. If we can't win at least one of these two games we are screwed. At least LOST starts on Wednesday Night!

Random Thoughts

There have been a few interesting things happening lately in the world. Here is my take on what I've been seeing on TV and the internet:

1) TO tries to commit suicide? Or does he? Who gives a shit. He makes a lot of money. And painkillers don't depress you...they make you feel really good. ESPN wasted the first 10 minutes of SportsCenter with this crappy story. Don't give him attention and the situation will go away.

2) Speaking of attention, this rule should also be applied to terrorists. Why do we continue to give these morons the pulpit they want to air their messages? We fuel the fire ourselves. Leave it off the news and focus on other things. There are other things going on in the world.

3) According to some conspiracy theorists out there, lower oil prices are a big plot by the Republicans to try and get re-elected. This one is really funny. I guess that W and his buddies now have oil prices rigged and the whole supply-and-demand thing that our economy is based on has disappeared. This is even more silly if you realize what it would take to pull something of this size off. Maybe MT.net has a theory on this one...Mark? On to the good news....

4) The third season of LOST starts next Wednesday at 9pm. I am SO addicted to this show, as Pimpbling can tell you. Is anyone else out there hooked on this show or am I just a dork?

......And the most important news item this week is.....

5) Mary Carey is running for governor of California again! Mary is a porn star who ran for governor a few years ago when Ahnold won. She actually finished 10th out of 135 cantidates, which isn't bad. This is without a doubt the best story of the week...only in America can this happen. Click here for the official site...it has to be seen to be beleived!

Lord Byron passes

The name Byron Nelson doesn't mean a whole lot to you unless you are a die-hard golf fan like me. He played in an era decades before Tiger Woods and 300 yard drives. He was widely respected as one of the great gentlemen to ever play the game of golf. He won 5 majors including two Masters, two PGAs and a US Open. But he will probably be remembered most for 1945...the year that he won 11 tournaments in a row and 18 for the year. While Tiger could someday tie or even break this record, it will always be Byron Nelson's first.

Blast from the past

I was just looking through the contents of my hard drive and came across this picture. I am sure that most of you saw this a few years ago, but it made me laugh my ass off for a while. If you can't read the words, just double-click on the picture and it will zoom in.

An Ugly, Hot Win

OK...the Dolphins are not a good team right now. They can't seem to run the ball...Dante can't seem to make consistent decisions...the secondary is really young. We sweated our asses off all day...I think I remember the scoreboard saying the heat index was about 100 degrees. But a win is a win and I will take it. Unfortunately, our buddies Paco and Taco in the row in front of us didn't show today, so it was rather quiet in Section 449. Must have been the heat. Even the annoying lady across the aisle was rather subdued today...she seemed to quickly give up on the "D" and the white picket fence by the end of the first quarter. Must have been the heat. Did I mention it was hot? Ugh. With a little luck, maybe the Dolphins can beat the Texans next week and even things up at 2-2. Lets all keep our fingers crossed.

Gameday Again!

A week after witnessing a thrashing at the hands of Buffalo, Pimpbling and I are heading south in hopes that today's game is better. It sure better be, because if the Dolphins can't beat Tennessee this week and Houston next week (two of the worst teams in the NFL), they are doomed to miss the playoffs for the fifth straight year. The good news is that I am optimistic and think we will win by two touchdowns today. Ok, maybe that's a little too optimistic given the performance of the past two weeks, but you gotta start somewhere. And yes...I am still pissed about the game last night. Why does Notre Dame always pull that crap at the end of games?

Time to wash my pants

I think I just shit myself. Cheryl is in bed and I am watching the end of the Michigan State/ Notre Dame game on the couch surfing the internet on her laptop. I've had a big smile on my face ever since I turned the game on just after halftime. It looked like Michigan State was well in control and on their way to certain victory. Notre Dame just picked off a pass and ran it in for a touchdown to go ahead by 3. Did I mention that I really hate Notre Dame? AAAAHHHH!

Life Aint that Bad

Is life really that bad right now? I keep hearing (and reading) about how bad the government is...about how bad the economy is...how prices are going up on everything...bla bla bla. Maybe I'm living in a fantasy world, but I just don't see it. Oil prices (and thus gasoline prices) are coming down. The economy and the stock market have been good for the last four years. Hurricane season has been real quiet this year (so far). Even the Republicans are looking better for the mid-term elections. And everyone now hates Hugo Chavez. Cool.

A Big O-fer this weekend

What a disappointing weekend...my record was a shitty 0-3. First, the Hurricanes get their doors blown off by Louisville 31-7. That sucked. Then my tickets to see Hootie get lost at UPS. That sucked. And then I had to sit through the Dolphins 16-6 loss yesterday from Section 449. That also sucked. After a weekend like that, you actually look forward to going back to work. And to top it all off...the Hootie tickets showed up on my doorstep this morning. Ugh....

So much for Hootie

Well, the tickets never arrived and Pimpbling and I are now Hootie-less. I have no idea what the hell happened to the tickets...maybe Joel marked them as "Overnight" instead of "Saturday Delivery". Well...it's raining anyway so I will consider it for the best.

At least I got to sit at home and watch the Hurricanes get DESTROYED by Louisville 31-7. Man was that fun. Maybe I should have gone to the concert and stood there with a lightning rod in my hands...that might be more fun than the trouncing I witnessed. It's too bad because Miami used to be a team with a potential to win the National Title every year...now they are a joke.

Well, not all was lost today. At least I got to see Notre Dame get dumptrucked by Michigan. There are few things in this world that excites me more than seeing Notre Dame lose...kind of like watching the Yankees lose a baseball game...it never gets old.